


The Dragon Conqueror

by dttwins



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, BAMF, BAMF!Bilbo, Bilbo fights better then Legolas, Bilbo is a warrior, M/M, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-14
Updated: 2014-02-14
Packaged: 2018-01-12 08:19:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1184014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dttwins/pseuds/dttwins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bilbo fights better then Legolas, trolls, goblins, spiders - no problem! Even Smaug will fall!</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Dragon Conqueror

"Oh no, they won't!" whispered Bilbo "Fili! Kili! If I free the ponies, crab them so they won't get lost! And Fili, give me one of you swords!"

\- "Are you sure, Bilbo? " mumbled Kili, who started to have doubts about the whole sneak in, free the ponies, don't tell Thorin plan.  
But Bilbo already got Fili's sword and was charging in with a cute battle cry. The things that happened next were unbelievable and the brothers have never seen anything like it. The burglar was so small they were sure he will be crashed and were ready to run in and stop the trolls from eating him. That. Didn't. Happen. Instead of cutting the rope as the princes thought or attacking the trolls legs, Bilbo somehow jumped on the fence that hold the ponies, from there with an amazing speed Bilbo run up the trolls hand reaching out for him and with a face twisted in an animalistic rage, stabbed the troll in the eye! The beast died with a surprised dumb look still on its ugly face. While the troll was still falling, Bilbo managed to jump on the shoulder of another one and cut its throat, the troll roared and tried to stop the blood gushing in a fountain, but it was too late and soon it too was falling on the ground dead. Bilbo didn't wait for him to die, in fact, not even a drop of blood touched him, he was already balancing on a rod holding the pot in the fire. From there up on the hand of the last troll, cutting the fingers that tried to grab him and stubbing the troll right in the open mouth, impaling him on Fili's sword.

Fili and Kili were standing with their mouths wide open, in shock. Bilbo was standing bend over, just taking deep breaths, tying to calm down from the adrenalin rush. After a minute spend in silence with only Bilbo's pants, the princes rushed over to congratulate the hobbit. They still couldn't believe their eyes. Bilbo was stammering and apologizing like the shy hobbit they all knew :  
-"I'm so sorry, Fili, but would you mind taking the sword out yourself and probably clean it as well. I apologize for the inconvenience, I would do it myself I just need a moment to calm down".

When the company rushed in to investigate the roars they all heard, the picture they saw stopped them dead in their tracks. Three trolls covered in their own blood, Fili cleaning his sword calmly and Kili and Bilbo discussing if they could eat what the trolls had in the pot for supper. Thorin, who was rather impatient for a dwarf, ordered an explanation and the whole company was astounded by who the warrior was. The dwarves spend a long time with their eyes bugged out and mouths open. After that they searched the cave and Thorin presented Bilbo with his short sword and grudgingly apologized, which Bilbo really appreciated even more then the sword. So it was a much more cheerful company that Gandalf found on his way back, the early morning becoming even better when the dwarves could see a wizard with his mouth wide open in shock, because it wasn't every day that you could see such a powerful being so surprised. Bilbo just stammered and blushed.

The next heroic battle where Bilbo could use his incredible skill was in the mountains, when they were all falling down the goblin tunnels. Unlike dwarves Bilbo landed on foot with his sword drown and he managed to go unnoticed by goblins. When the fat ugly goblin king started to talk, the dwarves and goblin both were surprised to see the hobbit appear from behind the hideous throne and stick his small glowing sword in the goblin king's neck. Bilbo jerked his sword out and with another strong hit managed to cleave the goblin's head away. "Fight! Fight!" Bilbo cried and while the goblins were still in shock after the death of their king Bilbo and the dwarves managed to dispose of quite a few of them, luckily Gandalf arrived just in time and the company survived with barely some scratches, even their provision was still in tacked. Unfortunately the goblins alerted the pale orc and so the dwarves and the hobbit have found themselves up upon a tree, trying not to fall. When Ori started slipping Bilbo who effortlessly climbed on a tree trunk, lent him a hand and got him on the trunk. While they were busy their King managed to run off to fight Azog. When the white warg bit Thorin and started shaking him like a ragged doll, Bilbo was running towards its owner, Azog. The pale orc really didn't expect or even see the agile hobbit jumping on the wargs head and sticking his small sword right in the orc's heart, Bilbo then turned and thrust his sword in the wargs brain, killing it. Thorin was released and they stood back to back killing wargs and orcs until the eagles arrived. On the Carrock, Bilbo turned into his blushing self and Thorin who couldn't hold his admiration anymore hugged him and asked to court him. How the whole company cheered! Gandalf was the most pleased. The old wizard thought himself quite a matchmaker!

While at Beorn's their courting progressed nicely and Bilbo even braided some flowers into Thorin's hair, things started to become gloomy in Mirkwood. It was dark and stuffy and depressing and the only happy break Bilbo had was when he climbed a tree to see the way. Of course it turned out even worse when on his way back he found out spiders were attacking. It felt like hours of Bilbo jumping, slashing, twisting, but in reality probably was half an hour when the spiders were dead and Bilbo could take a break. His company was mostly unharmed, just a few cuts and Dori waving on his feet from spider venom. Oin assured them he would be all right. Something was wrong though, Bilbo could feel it in his furry feet! Though in such a cursed place, it was hard to trust his instincts. Bilbo listened very hard, there! In the trees! "Elves! Defend yourselves!" the hobbit cried and with a battle cry disappeared in the nearby trees. Soon, the sound of swords clashing could be heard, though in a moment the dwarves were occupied with another group of elves. When Bilbo came back, the dwarves were surrounded and their weapon was on a ground. It didn't stop the brave hobbit and only seemed to make him angrier. He run to them and suddenly was on top of Dwalin's shoulders, then on top of Bofur's hat and the next second engaging the elves in battle. Bilbo smartly used his own short statue to his advantage and soon all the elves were knocked out. It still was the most difficult battle Mr Baggins participated in. The poor hobbit was so tired that they Fili and Kili had to support him. Luckily for dwarves Bilbo now knew the way and the company had provision which they stole from unconscious elves. In half a day they were already out of the cursed forest.

The Lonely Mountain was majestic. No wonder that Thorin was such a proud stubborn dwarf, Bilbo thought, if he grew up here. They had some problems with opening the door, but it was night now and Bilbo was preparing to go into the mountain. Thorin accompanied him as long as he could but the hobbit would enter the treasury alone. It turned out problematic to find the bloody stone and none of the dwarves curse them could explain to him how the Arkenstone was supposed to look. While Bilbo was busy slipping on the gold, Smaug the Terrible has awoken. The hobbit was scared; the dragon could crash him with one swipe of his tail. Nevertheless Bilbo tried talking to him, in order to find out his weakness. And find out he did! The legends were true! One scale was missing, right where the dragon heart was! Bilbo closed his eyes; he couldn't believe he was going to do this. He took a deep breath and then quick as a lightening he scaled the pillar and unsheathing his sword, the hobbit jumped on the dragon wing, while Smaug was busy roaring his outrage Bilbo was already jumping down, catching himself on the dragon scales and the next second the roar stopped because Bilbo thrust his sword deep in the dragon heart. The dragon fell and Bilbo with him. When the company ran into the room, they were amazed to see Smaug dead, their happy cries were cut short by the sight of Bilbo, lying motionless on the pile of gold, bleeding. Thorin felt as if a veil was lifted from his eyes, the gold, so attractive before, the Arkenstone, so important, didn't matter anymore. The shock of his One lying dead was so strong that the King couldn't move, just dropped to his knees. Fili and Kili on another hand rushed to the hobbit. "He is breathing, he is alive!" their happy cries awoken the rest of the company from their stupor and Oin rushed forward to help. Bilbo awoke some days later to being a hero and a consort of the King under the Mountain, but even many years later he still apologized too much and blushed whenever someone called him a Dragon Conqueror.


End file.
